As I reflect on my son’s first year of life, I can’t help but be amazed by how much my own life has changed since he came into the world. Oh, how I thought I knew what “busy” meant back when I was a Full Stack Developer at an early-stage startup, coding, learning, and pushing the boundaries of my skills. The long hours were a testament to my dedication, but once I left the office, I could usually disconnect and find solace in my personal life. Little did I know that a change was coming that would reshape my definition of busy and introduce me to a new kind of full-time job—being a mom.
The joys of maternity leave
Who would have thought that late-night debugging would be replaced by tender, tired nights cradling a sweet little one? Even with the pure exhaustion and shock that comes with being a new mom, the first few months of my son’s life were filled with countless priceless moments. Maternity leave taught me to slow down, to savor the simple joys, and to fully immerse myself in the pure bliss of motherhood. It was a time of discovery, bonding, and cherishing the precious miracle that I held in my arms.
Transitioning back to work from maternity leave
As my maternity leave drew to a close, I was horribly anxious. The thought of leaving my baby and diving back into face-paced full-time work filled my mind with doubt. Could I find the right balance between my career and my little one’s needs? Would I be able to give my best in both roles?
It was an overwhelming time, made even more challenging by half of my team and my manager being laid off just a couple weeks before I was meant to return to work. Then, I requested to ease back into work by starting 60% for a month or two, with a plan to ramp back up to full time over the course of a few months. Due to budget cuts and the requirement to downsize the team, they couldn’t afford to have me come back part-time.
At that point, I decided that I needed to try something new, maybe a job that’s more common to moms. Thankfully, I found my way to a technical writing role at Microsoft that embraced and supported my personal life while offering intellectual engagement and professional growth. Embracing these unexpected shifts became a valuable lesson in finding balance and harmony between my two worlds.
Let’s talk about sleep, baby?
Unexpected co-sleeping
When I returned to work, I started to miss my son greatly during the day. Not to mention, waking up at night if my son needed me became more challenging. Slowly but surely, I found myself co-sleeping. If you’d asked me before I gave birth or even in the first few months of my son’s life, I would have said that I’d never do it. While it may not be for everyone, co-sleeping has been amazing for me. Sharing a bed allowed me to deepen my connection with my son, and help us both get more sleep. Our nights are now filled with the soothing presence of each other.
If you do find yourself co-sleeping, whether intentionally or accidentally like me, make sure that you create a safe sleep space. The KellyMom article Co-sleeping and Bed-sharing covers what you should know with extra resources linked at the bottom.
Embracing the daily dance
Every day is a whirlwind of love and responsibility. I do my best to prepare the night before for the next morning, so that it isn’t too hectic when we are trying to get out the door in the morning. Ditching pajamas for regular clothes that my son can wear the next day was a huge time saver, as well as picking out my own outfit ahead of time. During my commute, podcasts provide inspiration and energy for the day.
At work, I type-type-type away and collaborate with a team of talented writers and engineers to create quality content. When the day ends, I rush home to engage in precious moments with my son—bath time adventures, dance parties, and bedtime stories. Then, with the support of my husband, I usually manage to make it from the couch, where I lay down like an exhausted fish on deck at the end of everything, to my bed at a somewhat reasonable hour.
Sidenote: I want to take a moment to give a shout-out to all the incredible stay-at-home moms out there. While working moms may have little breaks sprinkled throughout our days, like the drive to work or the indulgence of a fancy coffee at the office, I recognize that you often don’t get these sorts of moments built into your day. Your commitment to creating a nurturing environment for your little ones is truly admirable. You deserve all the credit in the world. Keep shining, supermoms!
Conclusion
Being a working mom is a continuous learning experience, but I can honestly say that I’ve found a way to make it work for me. My role as a technical writer at Microsoft not only engages me intellectually and professionally but also gives me a sense of purpose and fulfillment. It’s a path I walk with gratitude, knowing that I have the opportunity to embrace the best of both worlds.
To all the incredible moms out there, navigating their own unique journeys, I want you to know that you’re not alone. Embrace the shifts, cherish the moments, trust your instincts, and find the balance that works for you. Remember, it’s the little victories, the heartfelt connections, and the love we pour into each role that truly make us extraordinary. Together, let’s celebrate the beauty of motherhood and the resilience of working moms everywhere.